There is (or, at least there used to be) a New York style delicatessen in downtown St. Louis. Customers receive authentic New York rudeness when they first enter the establishment. Some people find this quirky and fun. Personally, I didn't care for it, but the sandwich was good.
This week I experienced a flashback of that mixed bag of emotions, when I contacted Customer Support at Tzumi.com.
Let me back up a little.
A few years back, my daughter-in-law procured for me an Ion mug. This cute little gadget contained its own warmer and battery. It charged on a coaster made just for it, and off the charger would keep my coffee hot for at least a couple of hours. It was a delight, and I used it constantly at work.
At least, I did until the contact pins of coaster lost their spring, and then I couldn't charge the mug anymore. I couldn't find replacement parts anywhere, so the mug went into my desk drawer, and I found other ways to keep my coffee hot.
A couple of weeks ago, I was tidying up and found the mug. I decided to give it one last try before throwing it out. Lo and behold, I found replacement coasters at Tzumi. At less than half the cost of a new mug, I figured I give it a shot.
The coaster arrived when promised (always a concern when shopping at a new place), and I eagerly took the box to work. There, I learned that the coaster did not include the charger adapter. This did not necessarily mean that all was lost. The bottom of the coaster included the voltage (12) and amperage (1.5), which is half the battle. However, it said nothing about the type of tip needed. I could tell that it was round, and on the small side, but it was anybody's guess whether the center was supposed to be positive or negative.
Back to tzumi.com I went, but could not find the charger on their website. I did, however find a chat button, and (guided by menus) managed to convey the following information:
Product: Ion mug charger
Customer Issue : Re: order 66888 - bronze ionmug coaster
This item apparently does not include the charger. I need to know what
charger to get for it. The coaster includes voltage and amperage
information, but not what type of tip is needed.
Customer Serial Number : Do not have
I thought that was fairly clear, but the reader may disagree. Certainly Mike Smith didn't think so.
Correct, John,
The item you ordered is just the individual coaster.
I may have one kickin' around here for you.
Do you have proof of purchase for the initial purchase of the complete coaster set?
-Mike
Mike Smith
#TS00108989
Technical Support
This is where things started to go south, and I must admit that the next misunderstanding is mine. I thought he needed my proof of purchase of the coaster I had bought from them, although I had included that information before. At any rate, I sent it again, copied from the email receipt. Sure enough, that was the wrong thing to do.
To be clear, John, I meant the proof of purchase for the original purchase of the original mug.
I already have access to the purchase of the coaster.
Yep, okay. But he didn't say "mug" in the first place, he said "complete coaster set."
I thought I'd set this back to my original request, which was only for information on what charger I needed. Unfortunately, I made the mistake of sending my reply on my phone, while half-groggy from sleep. I had intended to say,
Okay, also to be clear, I wasn't asking for a free charger. I just need to know what one to get.
But what came out was:
Okay, also to be clear, I want along for a free charger. I just need to know what one to get
And then I went back to bed.
This confused Mike a great deal. The snarkiness began to emerge.
The phrase "I want along" prevents your reply from being as clear as you've hoped.
Can you amend this grammar for.... clarity?
I'm not sure what you're getting at.
This is starting to feel less like a customer service request, and more like the comments on a Facebook post. I replied:
I wasn't asking for a free charger. All I ever wanted was information.
The
original mug was a gift. I have no purchase records. for it. This
coaster base is the only purchase that I have made at Tzumi. At this
rate, it will likely be the only one, ever.
I admit, that last sentence was uncalled-for. I often do the same thing on Facebook comments.
Mike's reply:
I see- it was a gift.
This was never mentioned.
I have a gift for you.
A "free" charger.
May I please have your mailing address?
No, I hadn't mentioned this originally. Why would I? This entire exchange was over a request for information. Why does it even matter where the original mug came from?
At any rate, I sent my address, with no further comment, and received the following:
Nebraska, eh?
My guess was Oklahoma.
This courtesy will go out later tomorrow.
USPS - 9400111206239550276267
I want along a great weekend.
-Mike
Now he has crossed the line into rude. Did no one ever train Mike for a customer service position? Does he have no idea how to make an email exchange professional, or does he just not care? I suspect the latter, for a quick Internet search revealed a history of terrible customer service.
To sum up: I (perhaps) will get a free charger that I didn't ask for, and all it cost me was enduring oblique personal insult.
What a bargain.
I rather doubt that I will get a request for feedback on the handling of this ticket, but if I do, then I will recommend that CS reps refrain from using the word "courtesy."
I will wait a day before considering any further reply. Will update when I know more.
At any rate, don't buy from Tzumi.com -- unless you're into that kind of thing, no kinkshame here.
Thank you for your attention.
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Windhaven by George R.R. Martin