Friday, August 19, 2022

Would You Like To Be A Cleric For Dunstan?

This happened in Robin's game, while we lived in Denver in the early 80's

 Our gnome cleric (who went by “Twit”)  had just discovered that he could gain experience by converting folk to his religion.  Eager for an easy 50xp, he accosted a random npc on the street.  

“How would you like to be a cleric for Dunstan?” he opened.  “It’s really great!  You get to adventure everywhere!  I’ve even been to the ninth circle of Hell!  And treasure like you wouldn’t believe!  I’ve got magic swords coming out of my ass!”

Now, one thing you must understand:  In our game, you just don’t say random crap like that in character, because you never know who might be listening.  Twit wasn’t kidding about the wide variety of adventures he’d been on, but he kind of left out the many powerful entities who still held grudges, and could bestow curses.  

The next couple of rounds were painful for Twit, but he survived.  And he earned the 50xp conversion bonus.  

The pile of swords all had “Nystuls’ Magic Aura” on them and a somewhat disgusted merchant offered fifty gold for the lot.  

The curse could have been removed - Twit himself was high enough level to cast the spell - but he never did.  

A couple of years later, I heard that another DM in Denver used Twit as a random encounter - but with a weaponized version of the curse.   Apparently a party encountered a gnome who merely turned around, dropped trou, and uttered the phrase:

“I’ve got magic swords coming out of my ass!”